I walk down this lane alone with ATPs left in my muscles and burning light in my chest.
I left my past behind me where I blamed so many people and so many things for my tears. I discarded so many ticks of the clock waiting for something that never came. I was so drunk, drunken by a huge wave of self-distrust, or self-contempt, i wasn’t sure, and i could barely stand, let alone walk.
While walking, i think of myself sometimes. How funny it is to lose the power to trust my strong self, while holding strong to a false believe that God isn’t very helpful.
What is ahead seems blurry but it promises me a future. The tiny light in my chest whispers me contentment and trust, and those are enough for me to keep walking.
I may be more vulnerable. I am helpless in God’s plan. But i am so strong i am invincible to whatever comes ahead of me.
So here I am, Dear sobriety lane, try me, and i may stay sane and solid, and fully accepting of God’s best plans.