Becoming idealistic, as always>.<

Well, thank God, all I can say. I have passed this semester’s exams. Whatever the result will be, I feel like I have done my best. I sacrificed my time to sleep and play, I read a lot, I realized many things lately. Though the results won’t always be exactly like we struggle for, I am hoping for the best. And even though these whole months I spent in vain, such as watching TV shows, sleeping, going around, I still fought for my fate these two weeks. I hope it will be paid off.

Since blogging will always be full of one’s life story, I want to share one. Uh, some, I mean. I am currently attending an Arabic course. Yeah, lughatul arabiyah. It’s twice a week. It needs recalling every time we get there to attend. It consists of nine girls. All are diligent, except me, maybe. I always feel I am smart enough not to so often recall the stuffs.

We are going to a step of what-so-called nahwu. Way different. Yeah, I am challenged. Moreover, I concluded that every time I got home from the course, I gained some of my confidence and existence (maybe it’s an improper word). I feel alive! I feel worthy. I feel I am quite important to exist here on earth. I live to learn everything, to notice and feel the senses of Allah’s creations. So it gives me certain satisfaction, even now, while I still can not understand a long sentence in Arabic. I always love to learn language. Even, on the last course on yesterday, the ustadz told us the importance of studying Arabic. That’s definitely our own language!! We use it everyday!!! And so on and so forth, with my heart soon became fired up just by hearing that.

I can say I am trying to provoke anyone reading this, that learning Arabic is beyond interest. It’s a need. It’s one of our way to be a real moslem, if we are one.

Now let’s jump to debate. Yeah, debate. One of my important things to be struggled for these months, after the previous final exams, research proposal, work camp, and for sure, Arabic course. We are facing the competition. It’s next week!!! Huahhh.. I really have to jump. Jump from all-night-alertness to another one. I need to read a lot of materials, otherwise I will be humiliated in front of everyone in the comp. I need to reduce my ‘medhok’ness, otherwise I won’t be able to catch anyone’s attention. I need to learn, I need to make big steps!

I do hope for that event. This really is my chance. As a girl who claims herself as having low confidence, I need this opportunity so bad. This is again my chance to prove to myself that I am able. I can do it, if I want. I can make it. Opportunity never comes twice.

About the research proposal, we are struggling together. My friends and I. We are five. We are curious and enthusiastic. We are motivated. We’ve planned the steps. Thus we will start our act soon. Big one!

I have no time to have the euphoria of post-exam days. Yeah, instead of doing this blogging, I mean. I need to go on. It’s always been good to be a moslem. There’s always be a verse about something. Even now, that “Do the next thing after finishing something.”

Well, no time to be wasted in vain. Our future depends on what we do NOW.

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